I Could Use Your Advice
I’ve got a parenting dilemma that I’d love for you to weigh in on. Please give me your advice and thoughts in the comment section. I feel like I can be pretty open about this issue because I am most certain that the person I will tell you about does not read my blog, but if she does…good.
Every week day morning, since September, I’ve walked Ben to his Jr. K class just down the block. Each drop off and pick up the parents chit chat together and it’s always been enjoyable, but in the recent months I’ve been having an ‘issue’ with one of the moms that drops off her daughter. What started out as a neutral ‘drop off’ relationship between us has become more than frustrating. Let me set the stage. The other mom, let’s call her Juanita, is a very flamboyant touchy feely mom with a big Latin flare. We’ve seen Juanita around the neighbourhood since Ben’s baby days but the relationship was more neighbour friendly than anything else.
Anyways, Juanita has taken to trying to kiss Ben and touch him and she will even chase him to pick him up and kiss him. Chasing him because he runs away from her when he sees her. He hates it. He does not like being touched or kissed by her and I think it is because it is so forceful and in your face. She is so over the top with the kissing and touching that Ben has asked if we can go to school later to avoid seeing this particular mom. The other day she also made a comment that Ben was ‘fat’. Not once. But twice. ‘Oi Ben! You little beet fat in the middle’. Oh my god. I will cut you lady. Who tells a kid that they are fat? Seriously.
It really makes me feel like a big old mama bear when my kid is visibly uncomfortable and upset and especially when it is another parent that is making him feel that way. Today, after she chased him into the preschool bathroom as he ran away from her, I told her that Ben does not like being kissed or chased but she didn’t hear me. Her own English is quite poor and I think she makes up for that by being so flamboyant with the kids.
So, this is my dilemma. I want her to stop teasing Ben and kissing him and touching him but I’m finding it a challenge. I don’t want to be the total bitch mom and give her major attitude but I also want her to hear me. To take me seriously and stop what she is doing.
Just a side note, Ben is actually a very touchy feely kid and usually enjoys giving hugs and also giving ‘movie star’ kisses. There is just something about this particular situation that is different and makes him want to crawl into a shell and hide away. I hate seeing him so uncomfortable. We also will be going to kindergarten with this little girl and will be seeing her mother. I need your advice!